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Special Programs: Special Friends
This program, founded in 1986, was designed to meet the need of
children in full-time child care for at least one unshared
relationship with an adult. One of the challenges of child care is
each child's need to share so many resources with the peer
group. This built-in lack of individual ownership and personal
privacy is sometimes difficult for any child. In addition, children
in full-time placement are rarely “in charge” of their relationships
with adults, most of whom are in positions of developmental
“authority.”
Special Friends (SF) is one way of giving the child an
exclusive relationship with an adult where power is equally shared
between the two participants in the dyad. These supervised
relationships, carried on directly in the classroom, are a powerful
tool to self-discovery and growth on the part of both the
preschooler and the Tufts undergraduate. The Tufts students, who are
volunteers from the Leonard Carmichael Society (our University
service association, where the TEDCC Director serves as a faculty
advisor), are recruited and trained by the teachers of TEDCC prior
to meeting their child. Great care is taken in making child-adult
matches, with consideration of the following factors: gender, race,
national origin, native language, special interests, preferences of
the family, and teacher knowledge about each child. In the same
way we attempt to match children and undergraduates who have a
common special need (attempting to offer each a strong positive role
model of someone with a similar disability).
Once matched, SFs visit the child weekly (at the same time each week
and for between two and three hours) under the guidance of the
classroom teachers and the SF coordinators. SFs must make a
full-year commitment, with the option to return the following year.
We have SFs who
have been in the program for as many as four years; every child has
a SF every year. SF pairs play in the presence of classroom teachers
who provide any needed support or feedback. SF workshops occur
throughout the year, on topics such as: how to start a relationship
with your child, how to manage challenging behaviors, saying
goodbye, or talking with your child about difficult issues.
Teachers, the Tufts undergraduates, and the families evaluate the SF
program each year; program changes are made in response to this
feedback. A large number of SFs have, as a result of this
experience, become Child Development majors, and many SFs remain in
touch with their child/family well beyond their Tufts years.
Research undertaken by a TEDCC teacher/SF coordinator indicates that
this program has a significant positive impact on both the
preschoolers and the adult students. SF has been featured at a
number of local, regional and national conferences, and was recently
showcased on the television show Chronicle, a New England
news/magazine program. In addition, Special Friends has been the
subject of a Tufts Masters Degree thesis.
Meeting once weekly for the entire school year has proven to be
immensely beneficial for all involved. Over the course of the year,
Special Friends work closely with the Coordinators and their
classroom teachers to address any issues that might arise, and
simply to keep each other informed of the visits. They gain a wealth
of information not only about their individual child, but also about
children and child development in general. Children also benefit
greatly from this program. Among many other things, children learn
to average time, and to discriminate the days of the week simply
based on the time their Special Friends come to visit. Children
become experts at balancing their wishes with those of their Special
Friends. In essence, they are able to build trusting relationships
and negotiate a variety of interpersonal situations. The Special
Friends Program is indeed a marvelous opportunity for all involved.
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