Coping with Tragedies

For Students

Each person's reaction to crisis is unique. Many feelings may emerge, such as sadness, anxiety, and anger – or numbness and an apparent lack of reaction. There is no right or wrong way to feel, but it is usually important to share reactions with people that you trust. Remember that it is often most helpful for people to just be with one another during times of crisis. Saying the "right" words isn't the most important thing; feeling connected to people close to you is.

For some people, the level of feelings or the kinds of questions that emerge may indicate that counseling support would be helpful. If you feel it might be helpful to talk to a counselor, please feel free to contact the Counseling and Mental Health Service (617-627-3360). Additional information on the process of healing from loss and trauma can be found at the following links.

• Managing Traumatic Stress

For Faculty and Staff

Tips for Faculty and Staff:

In the Classroom:
Following a large-scale disaster or crisis, providing some time in a class setting for emotional debriefing can significantly aid and accelerate the healing process. The following guide to emotional debriefing in class was adapted from a similar guide written for the faculty at Texas A&M University, and from Joan Whitney, Ph.D. "In the Classroom: Dealing with the Aftermath of a Tragedy".

• Consider providing time during class to discuss the incident. Students should be encouraged to express feelings in a supportive atmosphere.
• If you prefer not to provide discussion time during class - it is typically best to acknowledge the event. A national or local tragedy can result in students having difficulty concentrating. Failure to mention the event can result in students becoming angry at what they label as a "professor's insensitivity to what happened."
• If you choose not to devote discussion time to the event, you might mention to students that tragedies stir up many emotions, and remind the students that there are resources on campus where they might consider seeking support. On our campus, those resources include the University Counseling and Mental Health Service (617-627-3360, and here on the web), Chaplaincy, DOSA, and Residence Life (RA's).

If you do wish to provide an opportunity for discussion, here are some ideas to consider:

1. Acknowledge the event
   
    
2. Discussion can be brief
   Often, a short time period at the beginning of class is more effective than a whole class period. This serves the purpose of acknowledging that students may be reacting to a recent event, without pressuring students to speak.
    
3. Allow brief discussion of the "facts," and then shift to emotions
   People are more comfortable discussing "facts," than feelings, so it's best to allow this exchange for a brief period of time.
    
4. Invite students to share emotional, personal responses
   You might lead off by saying something like: "Often it is helpful to share your own personal reactions, and hear how others are responding. It doesn't change the reality, but it takes away the sense of loneliness that sometimes accompanies stressful events."
    
5. Encourage acceptance of all types of feelings
   Note that each person copes with stress in a unique way, and there is no "right way" to react.
    
6. Be prepared for blaming
   When people are upset, they often look for someone to blame. This is a way of coping. If the discussion gets "stuck" in blaming, it might be useful to say "We have been focusing on our anger and while that's natural, it might also be useful to talk about other responses."
    
7. Thank students for sharing, and remind them of resources on campus
   In ending the discussion, it is useful to comment that people cope in a variety of ways. If a student would benefit from a one-on-one discussion, encourage them to make use of campus resources.

Concerns about a Specific Student:
If you would like to discuss concerns about a specific student, contact DOSA at x73158, or call the CMHS at x73360.

Caring for yourself:
You, as a faculty or staff member, may also have strong personal reactions to a disaster or tragedy. If you would like to discuss your own reactions with a counselor, contact Health Resources, the Tufts University Employee Assistance Program. This is a confidential, short term counseling and referral service provided to employees without charge by Tufts University. The national, toll-free number is 1-800-451-1834 (TTY users please use Relay). In case of emergency, you can reach someone there 24 hours a day.

For Parents

Helping your Student Cope with Trauma:

Tragic events can arouse anxiety in a number of different ways. For many students, being away from home may be disconcerting at this time.

The following are some suggestions for helping your student cope with their reactions to this event.

1. Talk with your student
   Check in with your student. You may need to seek out your student and begin the conversation yourself. Give them an opportunity to voice any fears or other feelings they may be having. You may find that your student is the one to make the first contact, and that they seek more contact with you and other family members at this time. It is natural to want to connect with loved ones in this context, and it will be helpful for you to talk with your student as often as they wish.
    
2. Be a supportive listener
   Remember that there is no right or wrong way to feel in this moment, but it is usually helpful to express emotional responses. Encourage your student to express any feelings they might have about the incident. Reassure your student that it is natural to have strong feelings after a tragedy.
    
3. Remind your student to use information and supports on campus as well
   Encourage your student to seek support from friends, faculty, and other trusted individuals on campus. It is also a good idea to remind your student to be alert to campus communications and familiar with emergency procedures on campus.
    
4. Professional assistance is available
   If your student needs to talk with a professional, suggest that he or she call the Counseling and Mental Health Service at 617-627-3360 to make an appointment with a counselor.
    
5. Consultation to parents
   If you are concerned about your student and want to consult with a professional, call the Counseling and Mental Health Service at 617-627-3360.